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Cleaning up the mean streets of the internet - because somebody's gotta do it. From the cyberpunk hellscape of Neo-Chicago, Officer Kevin and Officer Grant monitor the world wide web so you don't have to. Leave us a voicemail to play on the show: 312-788-7361 or send an audio file to thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com The Thought Cops have deputized a number of your favorite thought leaders, content creators, comedians, online personalities, and more, in their effort to clean up the internet once and for all.
Episodes
Tuesday Oct 18, 2022
Tuesday Oct 18, 2022
"It's-a-us!" Not bad, right? Sirancha of The Loudest Podcast and Darkside Jills is b-b-back! Boo!! Sorry, it's October, that's sort of our whole thing.
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Field Notes
This week we complain about negativity on the internet! How hypocritical, how scandalous!! We also talk about the Mario movie because, come on. We HAVE to.
Some guy goes OFF on Halloween, Velma likes ladies, and there is a new M&M that people are mad at and we honestly cannot figure out why. Guess you have to have been a gifted child to understand, because nobody else does.
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Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Oct 11, 2022
Tuesday Oct 11, 2022
This is a reupload of episode 275, but Asterios did a guest edit of it. If you already listened to 275, consider listening to this edit of it. It's great!
Field Notes
Asterios edited this one so if you have any problems with it tell him. Our hands are washed.
"What're ya workin' on? Where can our listeners find you? Who're yer guyyyyys?" None of that on this episode. Back to basics. The days of training academy...
Anywho. We have a show to do.
Babe, wake up! James Earl Jones hangs up his Darth Vader cape and helmet, or rather he already did some time ago and he's been given immortality by a Ukrainian speech program created during wartimes. Crazy stuff, huh? Well it's all true, and you can hear us talk about it.
Lizzo played a flute and people got mad. She should have played the Song of Time and dropped one of those giant blue monoliths on them. You know the ones. Right.
The Try Guys fire one of their own this week. Also, we learn who the Try Guys are this week.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Oct 04, 2022
Tuesday Oct 04, 2022
Just in time for spoopy- er, I mean, spooky season, this week's guest is... Nobody! OoooOOOoooOO! Scary!
Field Notes
"What're ya workin' on? Where can our listeners find you? Who're yer guyyyyys?" None of that on this episode. Back to basics. The days of training academy...
Anywho. We have a show to do.
Babe, wake up! James Earl Jones hangs up his Darth Vader cape and helmet, or rather he already did some time ago and he's been given immortality by a Ukrainian speech program created during wartimes. Crazy stuff, huh? Well it's all true, and you can hear us talk about it.
Lizzo played a flute and people got mad. She should have played the Song of Time and dropped one of those giant blue monoliths on them. You know the ones. Right.
The Try Guys fire one of their own this week. Also, we learn who the Try Guys are this week.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Sep 27, 2022
Tuesday Sep 27, 2022
Brian and Jim of Drink A Beer And Play A Game are back! We went on their show this week, and they came on ours. The content creator's circle of life.
https://youtu.be/O5499R1LAbQ
Field Notes
We're still complaining about wordle, get over it. If you were in our discord server, you'd understand. Though that problem has been quarantined now. Thanks Zwick! Grant walks back a previous Key to the City as a new 2 Minutes Of Hate: The Patagonia founder giving away his money. Hey, you can't win 'em all.
All bets are off on twitch this week, because gambling is (sort of) a problem. "Most gambling. Okay some gambling. Okay we have no idea what we're doing all right?"
The mighty "Space Force" has a theme song now that middle school bands will be forced to play at football games for years to come. Hey, maybe you could use the annoying ukelele they gave you on a 12 hour flight to Honolulu.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Friday Sep 23, 2022
Friday Sep 23, 2022
The Queen is dead, but long live Shrek. That's right you know him from the world famous Shrek Retold and Milwaukee's very own Shrekfest, Grant Duffrin of the 3GI is back for another episode of Thought Cops!
Field Notes
This week, we talk about a bunch of stuff we know nothing about, the new SNL cast members, racist controversies about baby movies (the new Little Mermaid movie), the Queen dying, and celebrities on Cameo.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Sep 13, 2022
Tuesday Sep 13, 2022
Andrew Shankland is back to talk about recording his new comedy album, which you can buy tickets to here!
Field Notes
Hi progressive leftists! We know you enjoy your podcast with a peppermint latte, soywhip, and frickin... skinnied jeans. What year is it again?
The discourse around whether cellphones should be allowed in school has been heating up, and luckily enough, our guest is a teacher! We ask Mr. Shankland firsthand how accurate this is, being a teacher in the age of smartphones, and the stories (nightmares) you hear about. Jerry Seinfeld has one of the most bizarre photoshoots of all time, and quite frankly, we are here for it.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Sep 06, 2022
Tuesday Sep 06, 2022
We invent the character "Malorti Lightfoot" in this one. Revolutionary stuff as Nik Oldershaw of Doom Scroll visits Neo-Chicago!
Field Notes
The next "Baby Shark"? Believe it or not folks, it could just be true. Syndey Sweeney gets cancelled because of a guy in the background of a photo from her mother's birthday party, and is spanking making a comeback?? Holy crap, Lois!
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
Talk about opening a Can of Worms-- Jonathan Dunne is on the show with us!
Field Notes
Jonathan Dunne talks about his variety show Can of Worms which you can see at the Lincoln Lodge in Chicago! As such, we have a conversation about conversations regarding whether comedy should be offensive or not. And we're sick of it! Doesn't go anywhere productive, ever.
Netflix is very allegedly letting creators edit their programs post-release. The "Duffer" Brothers vehemently deny this claim, but fans have found proof showing otherwise. The Oscars not-so allegedly apologize for cancelling Sacheen Littlefeather 50 years ago.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
Kemonofriendzone's own Anime Serbia is back on the show to complete his podcast appearance hat trick!
Field Notes
Cracker Barrel has gone... woke? Oh, say it ain't so! Well, judging by the title of this week's episode, you bet your behind it is.
You know what sucks? Negative comments. Not gonna front or pretend or anything, they're a bummer! Let it out, it's cathartic. Speaking of letting it out, someone should let that guy in his cage out over at CPAC.
Hamilton has gone... anti-woke? Oh, say it ain't so! ...Hello?
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
This episode may just live rent-free in your heads, and we're going to start charging rent. Comedian and cartoonist for The New Yorker Mads Horwath is with us today!
Field Notes
Cover letters suck, right? Apparently you can't say sp*z anymore, at least according to Lizzo and the Brits. HBO and Discovery simultaneously merge and destroy, leaving behind a media landscape with nothing but Shark Week and freaking... Honey Boo Boo!
For real though: what happened to those guys in the 90s who wore Cat In The Hat hats? Please call us and let us know.
Join the Thought Cops Deputy Patrol
Join the Thought Cops Discord!
Click here to buy Thought Cops shirts, hoodies, stickers, and mugs.
Like what we do? Buy us a Ko-fi!
Episode produced by Commissioner Zwick
Leave the show a voicemail at 312-788-7361 or thoughtcopspodcast@gmail.com